OK. So I'm, like, writing a story here. I need some advice on how to make it better. Please understand that not everything you say you want changed is going to get changed. Here is the first part of my story. I am only going to post the prologue. Again, sorry for any inconvenience.

Prologue

(Jade)

“I don’t want to go to the kiddy room, Mom. There aren’t going to be any people to hang out with. I wanted to see Jake. I don’t think Jake is going to be in the kiddy room though. No! He’s going to be dancing with some other girl while I’m stuck in a tiny room with a bunch of babies.” I said as my mom was getting ready for the ball. My family and I were on a cruise heading into the Bahamas. There was a ball in the ballroom and my mom and dad were invited, but not me. “I don’t see why I can’t go.” I asked for the hundredth time. “It’s not like you’re going to see me that often.”

          “You aren’t old enough, you aren’t well behaved enough, and I just don’t want to have to worry about you getting into trouble. Besides, if Charm can’t go, what makes you think you can go?” My mom answered with a little strain.

“But I’m eleven and Charm is twelve. How old do you think we have to be to go to a party? Ninety?” At that moment, Charm came in. Great timing. Charm looks like me, same small, but strong body, same features, but she has maroon hair and green eyes, while I have blond hair with golden eyes. I looked at Charm, and then gave an exasperated glance towards mom. Mom always brings Charm into every situation. Sometimes it is as if she likes Charm better than me, but I would never ask her. The only person I would consider talking about it too would be Charm, because we are so close. She is always so calm about everything. Nothing seems to upset her. One time at school, Charm was hanging with some of her friends in the hallway and this guy came right up to her and slammed her books on the ground. She didn’t even mind, though. Without even flinching, she stared at the guy until he picked up her books for her. He walked away looking very confused and he never bothered her again. Ever since then, she has been known as the peace-maker of the family. My mom walked into the other room to pick out jewelry. I followed her to the door, trying to be as annoying as possible. She always gave in when she wanted me to go away.

          “Charm doesn’t want to go either. Right Charm?” I questioned her, trying to send some sort of signal for her to go along with it. I think its called telekinesis. She didn’t seem to pick up on it, because she gave me a calm smile and said.

“Actually, I don’t really mind going. I have plenty of books to read and you can bring your coin collection. I bet people will drop coins. You could add to your collection. Didn’t you always want to find that 1972 double-strike?”

“ Charm…” I started to whisper, but right at that moment Mom came in from the other room where she was getting ready and exclaimed,

          “Perfect! It’s settled then. Thank you, Charm. I don’t know what I would do without you!” Mom gave Charm one of those, you saved me from answering “that child” and she gave me one of her smiles. Instead of returning it, I gave Mom a glare before heading into my room to get my coin collection. Mom always thinks Charm is more mature than me only because we are a year apart. It’s really not that big a deal. She just gets me so mad sometimes. I really like my mom; this is just one of those times when I don’t. This is one of those times when I wish she would just get out of my life. I was about to shut my bedroom door, but for some reason I felt the need to just look at my room for a little while. It was going to be a long day and I guess I wanted some peace. I took in all the posters on the walls, my messed up bed and Charm’s perfectly laid out sheets on top of a perfect mattress. Suddenly I felt angry, like it was Charm’s fault for not letting us go to the party. I knew better than that though. I went into the bathroom and flattened my hair a little. After I had taken a long look at my room, I rushed out into the corridor, leaving my coin collection behind.